The naysayers will not get me down! Yep, I’m talking to you mom

13 Nov

So, of course some don’t understand, least of so my mother. What’s new?

My Mother...if she had a comb-over and was a white old dude

Why do you need to lose weight?

You are already too thin.

You know a few summers ago, your face looked terrible when you got too thin.

You better be careful, you

were sick you know.

Why are you doing this?

Are you sure this is safe?

I’m so used to it with her it has almost started to empower me in the opposite way of what she has to say. Now understand, my mom loves me, but maybe a little too much. I know her comments are all based in fear. She is still freaked out about my having had leukemia, so anything I do health wise scares her that I will relapse. But It’s still totally annoying. I think the worst part is she won’t listen to me because she already has her mind made up that it’s wrong and that she knows best, as always!

I was really tired yesterday and I probably spent most of the day complaining about it everyone. I only had 4 hours sleep in a 48 hr period, and it hit me like the worst mofo hangover in the world. The worst part of it was I didn’t even get to do the fun part to get there. No I-shouldn’t-be-doing-this  tequilla shots, falling on my 4 inch heels, or forgetting how I got home. Nope, staying up to make 22 mother fucking parachutes for my 4th graders class, that the teacher threw in the garbage after they were done!  Now you have to understand, I hate complaining.  I’m human and I do enjoy a good bitch session with my girlfriends as much as anybody, but I like to make it light and funny, and about other unsuspecting people.

I think now that I am through the sleep deprivation period I can handle the negativity in a more rational way, like avoidance. I know I can’t change her or others negative thoughts and ways, so I find my way of dealing with it so that I can still have them in my life and not let them get me down.

Now to the good part. I have actually lost 2 lbs this week, and many inches! I know it doesn’t sound like a lot, but for me it’s 1.5625 % of my fat gone for good! My jeans that were a little snug after getting back from CA this summer are now almost too big! That feels great!  It’s been a little hard for me figuring out food to eat that gets me to fall into the right mix of carbs/protein/calories, but I’m getting there. One week down, 11 weeks to go!

Yodelayheehoo!

Photo shoot in T – 90 days!

7 Nov

What you talkin’ bout Willis? You’ve got to be kidding me?! But mark her words, I’m going to be willing to put myself in a photo, in a swim suit, in February. Yes, this February of the year 2012. My thoughts again drift to more wise words from Arnold Jackson…What she smokin? “She” is the head honcho, the big kahuna, and she says I can do it. With all the success and reveals and transformations that she has done for others, who am I to question it?

Well, I’m that girl, the one who can pass for fit if you don’t look too hard. I’m athletic and I wear a size 4. I’m not a crazy anorexic who just thinks I am fat, I have the rolls to prove it, but not for much longer… well, that’s what she said! Now I just have to convince myself this is possible and get to work!

Ready set? clap! clap! You bet!